TiP fOr TuEsDaY

Be prepared!

I am the mother of three kids. They are happy, healthy, and fairly well adjusted. They have all gotten bigger now, well big enough I don't have to follow them around constantly anymore to keep them out of harms way now. I remember when they were little though, it wasn't always that easy to keep them safe, we had our mishaps, bumped heads, falls down Grandma's stairs, sickness, near-chokings. I couldn't always keep them safe, but I was prepared when things did happen. You don't always know what to expect when you become a parent, but being prepared for "just in case" was always helpful. How does one become "prepared"? Let me give you a few tips on what has helped me!
Take a first-aid class.
I have taken several over the years and have retained the knowledge to today and I believe it is essential to have some knowledge as a parent. I know how to treat a fever and perform the infant Heimlich maneuver. I can stabilize a broken bone and apply a tourniquet. I know how to slow/stop bleeding and administer mouth to mouth resuscitation. I know not to panic when the kids get hurt and when to seek medical assistance when necessary. I can't tell you how many times I've found these things useful in my life and in fact I got to demonstrate the infant Heimlich for a friend yesterday. The baby was fine, I just realized her Mom didn't know what to do for a choking baby....wow!

Invest in a child-rearing publication.
I believe on of the very best things my Mom ever did for me, was get me a subscription to Parents magazine. You'd be amazed at how many things you can learn from the experts they have that write articles. Anything from developmental expectations to toy recommendations and product reviews. I used to read it from cover to cover. Also, get yourself a great book such as Dr. Spock's Baby and Child Care. I used this to tell what my baby should be eating at 6 months and beyond and developmental milestones to be on the look out for and any questions I had, could easily be referenced in his book.

Use your friends/relatives that have/had kids.
I'm sure you can't tell by this blog, but I try to not be pushy with other parents on sharing tips and pointers. If I know you well enough though, you'd better believe I'll let you know what works best for me! If you are having a hard time with a child and are fed up or are unsure what to try next, hit up a friend who had done that same thing. I don't know what I would have done if I couldn't call my Mom and ask for her advice when my kids were little and even now! She always remembered what it was like and what she would have done and somehow it always made it better.

Being a parent isn't always easy and try as we might, we can't always keep them safe. Being prepared for the "just in case" in their little lives is essential to knowing what to do and when and how to deal when it does. That's your TiP fOr TuEsDaY! ;0)

tHiS iS wHaT i LiKe

My Swivel Sweeper!

Haha, no I didn't not buy this infomercial spotlighted product off of my TV, but I did receive it as a house warming gift from my in-laws!(the Ex's) Honestly, it wasn't until recently that I even got it out and charged up the battery. Umm, let's just say it got misplaced after I received it and I just found it...again. (psst...it was in the bottom of my man's pantry that was so gross!) I instantly fell in love! I start it up and wander all around the hard floor surfaces in my house and eats up crumbs and swivels and makes quick work of hair and glitter and Lego pieces get eaten up and off the floor in a snap! Then when I'm done, I pull off the lid to the chamber and dump it out into the trash (retrieving the Lego pieces of course!) and store it neatly next to the fridge. What I love is it's great for everyday clean-ups when I'm far too lazy to get out the vacuum or torture myself by sweeping and kicking up dust. The kids like to use it too, which is always a plus! ;0)
So, if you have a house with wood floors or tile like I do and want something that's lightweight, effective, and easy to use, try a Swivel Sweeper! I know I like it and I'll bet you would too! ;0)

ThOuGhT fOr ThE dAy

Be the very best parent ever!

This thought isn't nearly as hard as you might think it to be. Really all it takes is stepping back and thinking, is this the very best for my child?, is this the very best I can do?, is this REALLY what I want and not what my child wants? You see, that isn't so daunting, is it? ;0) Let's break it down:

Is this the very best for my child?
Do you spend more time in your day running to activities for your child than time at home? I want my children to be able to experience life and achieve, but I also want then to enjoy being children. If you spend more time running to lessons and classes and activities than anything else, take a step back and think. It might not be the very best for your child or for you. Let your child decide on a couple of activities they really enjoy and concentrate on those. Don't try to persuade them one way or the other either, really let them choose. This way you know the they are really enjoying themselves and will still have time to be kids!

Is this the very best I can do?
Honestly, some parents don't get it, they would much rather not do things because they plain just don't want to. It may be difficult, it may be boring to them, it may be...WAIT!! Once you had those kids, it is NOT about you anymore! My kids have been good, no fighting, did their chores, keeping up with their schoolwork and now want to go to McDonald's. I dislike McDonald's, the food ain't great, there are far too many screaming kids...but, wait, it isn't about me is it? So what do I do? I take them to McDonald's and they love it. Me? Yep, I'll get over it! I actually have a couple of friends who have a child and all I ever hear from the Mom is how the Dad won't do things or get things for the child that she needs because he doesn't AGREE with them. What?! I asked, "Uh...didn't you tell him, it's not about him anymore?" I mean come on!? Okay, that's it...now I'm annoyed so next question! ;0)

Is this really what I want and not what my child wants?
It's okay, we all do it sometimes right? I REALLY want these shoes Mommy and you suggest a cheaper pair, am I right? Ha ha you caught me, I totally do that too, but this isn't really what I'm talking about. You sign them up for karate because you took karate and now they throw a fit every time it's time to go. Did you ask your child if that was what they wanted to do? My guess would be a no. Take the time to really get to know your child and their wants and wishes because they are NOT mini-you's. Children deserve to be treated with the same respect you deserve and if someone just signed you up for something and told you you had to go you'd be pissed right? Right.

When you think back about being a kid do you remember you parents talking down to you and not paying attention to what you want? Think about it then and try your hardest to be the very best parent ever, it's not that hard....just a thought. ;0)

The things we do for our children...

Occasionally I find myself amazed at things I do for my children, you know things you never pictured yourself doing! My man and I sacrificed something for ourselves for my daughter's birthday this year, click here if you want the details, but I find myself doing these things most days.
Even in the old days of being married to the kid's Dad and coming home with him wearing the princess crown playing on the floor with our daughter. "Oh Daddy, are you a princess too?", I'd ask and he'd give me a sheepish look. I sacrifice sleep frequently, up at 6:45 five days a week for my son, to school at 7:50 with my daughter 2 days a week. I sacrifice the gas in my car driving to 2 different schools 3 times a day most days and 4 times a day on 2. I am limited to times I can shower daily, times I can grocery shop weekly, times to get the laundry done and the house cleaned as well. The kids go to school and the mad dash of chores and errands and hobbies and Mom time begins and always ends just as quickly as it starts it seems! I sacrifice my needs to make sure they have what they need, I sacrifice my wants to make sure they have what they want. I spend my money on them and when I get more, I spend it on them too! I sacrifice a clean house for playtime, I sacrifice a good meal for popcorn and a movie sometimes too.
Of course there are things that I want, but the happiness of my children far outweighs anything that I want hands down. You know why? Because the thing I ultimately want is them, healthy, happy, strong, and able to make whatever they want out of life a reality. The ability for them to be successful, happy, and able to contribute to society starts with you Mom. I, for one, am okay with just that.

TiP fOr TuEsDaY

Got Homework?

Since the school year is in full swing at my house, of course this means lots and lots of homework! In fact, as I am typing away at this, my little one is sitting on the floor next to me completing his. I am so completely amazed at the amount of homework my kids have! I don't even remember having homework in Elementary school, but my little one did in Kindergarten a couple of years ago....crazy! I thought I'd share a few tips on how to make it a little more manageable for Mom and kids alike!

No procrastinating!
As soon as mine walk in the door after school, they get right to work. I know, I know I've heard the advice on letting them unwind and whatnot, but my kids seem to be able to sit and complete it and enjoy the rest of the evening easier this way. I dunno, maybe it's because they are still in school mode! I let them have a snack, get comfortable and get cracking...never fails, everyone is done by 5 and we can worry about playing and exercise and dinner afterword!

To each his own!
Have each kid have his/or her own space to get their homework done. I have two boys that share a room and that makes it a little more difficult for them not to bug each other during homework time. No problem. My sixth grader gets home from school at 2 while the other two aren't done until 3:30. My sixth grader comes home and gets his snack and gets to work on his homework quietly while just Mom is home and puts a really big dent in it by the time the other two get home. He hangs out at home while I fetch the others and when they get home they get their snack quietly and my daughter goes to her room and my little one joins me in the office. He works on his homework and I check my e-mail, win-win if you ask me!

Helicopters and homework don't mix!
Are you a helicopter parent? I mean do you HOVER? Hovering and homework are a bad combination in my mind and I know (unfortunately) from experience that it doesn't work either. I sit down with my kids before the school year and lay down my expectations for the upcoming year and let them be responsible for their own selves. Really you ask? Really. Especially with my Asperger's child. He is so smart, if albeit a tad irresponsible, but not about his schoolwork. Yes, he may forget his jacket at least once a week and yes, he did come home covered with chocolate pudding from lunch today, but with just a little organization, homework is a snap! Which leads me to....

Teach the life-long skill of being organized!
Are your kids crazy? Chances are, you are too. Moms who are patient and organized have kids who are as well. My boy with the Asperger's had a really tough time a couple of years ago, with doing homework, turning in homework, losing it in his desk...until the magic orange folder was introduced. The orange folder is where anything that needed to go home was put, right when it was handed out. Magically the homework came home, the homework got done, the homework got turned back in. Magical, eh? ;0) Organization does not come natural to this guy at all, so a little encouragement was necessary. This year, he has 6 different teachers and 6 different classes, disaster huh? Nope! He has a master folder with pockets for each of his classes where his homework goes into and is returned finished and according to the progress reports I just read, he's got it! All A's, that's my boy! ;0)

Don't have kids with homework? Don't worry my friend, you soon will...but, follow my advice and of course my TiP fOr TuEsDaY and you too can handle it with ease! ;0)

Recycled from the blog reel

First off I am aware of the fact that it is Monday and I supposed to boring you with my tHiS iS wHaT i LiKe segment...ummm, yeah. I am not overly prepared today, too many resources being used up to plan for a little girl's birthday this week! ;0) It's all good though, this is why we keep archives for just such an occasion! I might make this a feature on occasion! I first published this on my Among the Lambsfold blog on August 19, 2009 give it a read!:
...and so I've learned

Earlier this week I was training a new employee and one of my regular customers leaned over the counter to tell me, "Now if you want anyone to think you are a day over 19, you'll have to cut your hair again..." This is something I hear frequently well, not about the hair, but something similar to this. I usually have someone asking me if I am still in school or telling me "you are too young, you wouldn't know." I know at some point I will enjoy everyone thinking I'm at least 10 years younger than I really am. For now it's kind of annoying, I've lived a lot of life since 19 and I would just like a little credit for what I've experienced. Here's a few things I've learned in this journey we all call life:

1. If your boyfriend/partner/significant other treats you like crap he is abusive. I unfortunately know this from first hand. Please watch for the warning signs and don't find yourself in this situation. If he treats his family with disrespect, don't be with him. My ex-husband was so mean to his Mom...yelled at her, took advantage of her, never spoke to her with respect. I wish I had known to pay more attention to this before hand. Everything wrong in his life is the fault of someone else. He couldn't hold a job because of the boss, or because of the co-workers, never because he couldn't get it together enough to work it out. If he ever raises a hand to you or is rough with you or calls you names , leave. I've been called every name in the book (none of them nice), I've been thrown, kicked, punched, hair pulled out of my head, made to feel absolutely worthless, I've also survived. The day I realized I deserved to be treated with respect and knew that I didn't need him to live my life, was the day I gained my freedom.

2. Raising kids is so much easier if you don't stress over little things. I have three and have spent the last 4 years as a single Mom. Yes, I have Lee who is every bit as helpful as a man who has never had any kids, but I've learned what is truly important. If your house isn't spotless, who cares!=0) I work, I come home, I help out with homework, make dinner, put kids to bed and wind down to start again tomorrow...taking the kids to school, getting ready for work...sometimes my house is only cleaned on the weekends. Sometimes we pick through piles of laundry through the whole week before it gets put away on my days off. My kids are happy though and well adjusted and every spare minute we have isn't spent trying to catch up on housework. =0) Let your kids be themselves. If that involves wearing a set of chinchilla ears to school sometimes then so be it. If your daughter insists that she needs to wear polka dots and stripes at the same time then let her. Hey, as long as they have the same colors in them, then go for it I say!=0) If your kids won't eat anything except cold cereal, pizza, pb and j, oh well! This is why someone invented the multi-vitamin! Have them try new things, but don't stress if they don't like it or won't eat it.=0)

3. Not everyone is going to like you or what you have to say. You know I'm opinionated, you know I only am if I know what I'm talking about. You are not going to hurt my feelings if you don't like me or what I have to say. This is where having some self confidence is quite useful.=0) As long as I am trying my best to be the best kind of me there is, I no longer let myself beat myself up over stuff that can't be helped or that I messed up on. I'm happy, I have so many good things going for me and I can handle anything that comes my way. (Hopefully)=0)

4. I have the very best parents ever! Always understanding and willing to help me out, I couldn't have asked for better parents, ever! I wished I had listened to them closer when I was younger, I probably could have saved myself a lot of grief if I had taken there advice more often. They support me and are not judgmental. They helped me escape an abusive marriage and regain the custody of my kids and then helped me out with rent and a car until I was able to get on my feet again. Mom and Dad you rock! I love you so much!=0)

Now that 12 years have passed since I was actually nineteen, I know that I've lived so much life since then. Knowing that whatever I've faced has strengthened my character and no matter how much I protest, I'm always going to look much younger than I am. I know better though, even if I don't look any older, people are going to think what they will and so, I've learned...=0)

ThOuGhT fOr ThE dAy

"And they were canopied by the blue sky, So cloudless, clear, and purely beautiful, That God alone was to be seen in Heaven."
Author: Lord Byron (George Gordon Noel Byron)

One of my favorite quotes and it echoes my thoughts when I see the bluest of skies. It's like looking through a mirror and being smiled upon by the heavens. I'm honestly not sure why this quote came to mind today, perhaps because I was thinking about something someone said to me the other day. It had to do with how I personally felt about a situation and this person decided that my feelings didn't deserve merit. Fair enough, was initially reaction, I mean we are all entitled to feel how we will. The more I though about it though, the more it saddened me to think that this person really didn't have the capacity to accept, well just that, acceptance. Unquestioning acceptance. I'm not one to judge people for their actions, for their beliefs, for their beings and I'm curious as to why this person felt that my concern was unjustified. I probably won't find out anytime soon, but it sure made me sad. To not be able to look heavenward through the bluest sky and know that you are...is tragic to say the least. To know someone cares, whether you think they should or not, should warrant gratitude and not be questioned. Just a thought.